Freshers 2011

Ok then!!! We all have waited really long for this year's freshers, everyone for a different reason of course. Some coz they wanted to show off some skin due to the stringent dress code in college, some (read seniors) to flaunt their "oh-so-cool" new dress or the like in front of the poor juniors and some (read my gang n me) to bitch and write about all this.
      Fresher's started as usual with a bang (though i was not there to witness the beginning). I still can't figure out what was with the whole "Hawaiian" theme. According to me, it was just a ploy so that people could wear just about anything random and not be criticized or ridiculed for doing so. Tough luck there LSD!!! I ain't letting you all get away so easy.
    I'm going to try to be a lil bit nice to people in this blog today coz, well, just coz i'm in a good mood. Let's begin with the juniors. I must say, the lot definitely has much better dressing sense as compared to a few of their seniors. Impressive. The nice things first: the junior LSD members were dressed so quaint with flowers in the girls hair and garlands for the boys. They really did do justice to the whole theme. Apart from them, there were a couple of media juniors who also looked really cute. The wonders that a flower stuck on your hair can do to your entire profile. Just realized that last night. For the fashion-ignorant who attended, I do have a few questions which have been gnawing at my already pea-sized brains. Wearing a flowery top with shorts and pink pumps with black stockings does not really make you Hawaiian or then again, does it??? Very retro which was not really the theme, check your dictionary the next time you dress for themed parties. I think one of the guys was going for the Ganpati Visarjan Dance or Dahi Haandi ceremony but lost his way and ended up coming to River-view.
    Though the theme did allow everyone to be comfortable in their skin, it certainly did not give them the right to get on other people's skin. A very snooty girl who looks down upon practically everything, who I have nicknamed "plastic" (refer to the movie mean girls if you can't relate) definitely thought that she was being invited to the prom, what with the frills and all on a tiny corset sort of top portion of the dress. Honey, please work out just a lil bit so as to get rid of those baby elephant thighs before you decide to shock any of us ever again. The girl dressed in virginal white, did you come from a christening ceremony or were you just trying to be chaste??? Just wondering.. Also, converse chappals??? WTF!!! It's a party which just has a specific theme and the last time I checked, it definitely didn't include bathroom slippers. A little solace, someone was wearing anklets made out of those chameli type of flowers. Too many flowers though; the girl was seriously making me wonder if she was interested in doing the hula.
     Speaking of dances, this year the Freshers saw something new- a professional belly dancer. And what she wore actually looked like some night-gown with sticks stuck to the arms for the gown to fly. She could have just opted for bungee-jumping instead. Definitely more fun than what she was trying to do wearing that costume coz i'm sure as hell it certainly wasn't belly-dancing.
      That was about the juniors and the firang dancer who definitely had to be included. Coming to my favorite part of the blog where I am very nice in explaining my classmates clothes for the party. The theme (sorry but I DO need to re-iterate this all the time) was Hawaiian but we had girls who dressed up like they were going for a wild African safari party. Shed the animal print darlin'... it's not in vogue anymore and the only time it will look hot now is if you wear it for a wild romp in the bedroom (if you get my drift). For someone who has never been featured in my blog before (n this is aimed at a whole bunch of them), either lose the tummy or do mankind the favor of wearing dresses that hide the flab. I get it that there are women in the world who are very proud of their tummy fat but for the sake of good fashion designers and critiques, please "spare me the horror" (line courtesy: the movie fashion)
    What is it with women who ALWAYS choose to wear a shade of compact two tones lighter than their skin tone??? Writing a blog on clothes is fun but if I have to give blog lessons on make-up, I'm going to have to charge you. The dress, baby girl, it was a Hawaiian party not a "Chinatown" party; piece of advice: diss the shoes next time, it'll probably make you still look like you are in the groove. For controversy's favorite children (read my two most favorite dressers) definitely had a lot of glances coming their way (and this is  not including mine.) For the one, who was the boys "favorite" once-upon-a-time and suddenly decided to break their hearts by not showing her pwetty face: makeup- check, shoes- BDSM lovers should definitely take a cue from you, dress- did you pick it up from the children's section honey??? Oh wait, or was it coz you really wanted to show-off white legs which weren't totally toned (tch tch, sack the personal trainer I say) and guess what, she was not the only one.
    Ladies, understand this, men like to look IF the goods on display are worth looking. Having thunder thighs is not a crime but to flaunt them and make everyone around you nauseous will and can be held against you in the courts of fashion across the world. How I wish they really did exist and were not just a mere figment of my imagination. And wearing black short dresses (with slits) which are two sizes below your original size is like me thinking I am Bar Refaeli and going to the beach wearing a bikini which makes men drool. A little bit of pity for humanity will surely take you a long way in life. For my second favorite: dress-check, makeup- I really don't want to get there, shoes- did you get them custom made for your wedding??? Though i really liked the heel on the sandal, but on the whole, like seriously??? Please try considering what if there were fashion courts.
   Phew!!! The things Donatella Versace would do if she were to come to any of our college parties. For starters, I'm sure, she'll just decide to stop designing. I do agree with Ambalika Sen that a lot of people did learn a lot, but then again, what was that English proverb about "old habits dying hard"???
    What with all the competition and emphasis put by the seniors to wear a dress shorter than that of her rival, instead of "ALOHA" (in a sing-song voice,) I think the theme of Freshers 2011 should have been "You can see, but not touch!!!"

Lingerie Peeves

             Ever heard of the saying: "DRESS TO KILL AND UNDRESS TO THRILL"? For those who are unaware (and are women,) I'm shocked to say the least. Nonetheless, for those reading this blog, it's the tagline of one of the most famous lingerie brands in the world. Unfortunately, looks like people of my class aren't really too bothered about what they wear inside. Which is the topic of discussion today.
             Let's start at the basic, it's pronounced as "lawn-je-rey" and not "linger-ee". For heaven's sake woman, get the sentiment right first. I'm aware of a lot of people who think wearing a darker shade of lingerie over a lighter colored dress or top is uber-cool. Darling, it's so NOT COOL. Unless of course you're going to audition for some porn movie. Then of course it's justified.
             Enter the patriot, I get it you have weight issues but please try to upgrade your lingerie wardrobe once in a while. It'll do you a whole lot of good if people don't see your loose bra straps hanging out. Or better still, take lessons from the girl who wishes she was born a guy on how to wear a good shade and carry it off. I'll bet my last penny if nothing else, she'll definitely improve your strap image in class.
             Coming to the girl who is 'kind of sought after' blah blah blah and for a woman who has a lot of fan (read guy) following, sweetheart you need a complete image makeover not just a lingerie makeover. The last time I checked into Victoria's secret, a good bra was considered to be one which fit well and also one that you hooked on your back not your shoulder just about an inch below your neck. Also, please don't try to imitate Victoria's secret or La Senza by wearing cheap red underwear. So not cool. Simple rule: if you can't afford it, don't degrade it.
              For the girls, ever tried wearing a white bra non-stop for i don't know how long that the strap turned yellow??? Yes, we do have girls who fall into that category as well. I get it you're obsessed with white because it's such a virginal color but if not for your, at least for people's sake, try washing it once in a while. That way when the strap shows from your tee, hopefully people will look at you from the virginal perspective you're aiming for. I thought I had mentioned it the last time as well but i guess i'll have to re-iterate the point. Sugar, if you're well-endowed, do mankind the favor of going to a store that caters to your size and pick up the right fit. You can't walk all around the place acting like Santa Claus and jingling your own bells (pun intended.)
             I'm of the firm belief: if you're wearing lingerie worthy enough to flaunt, GO AHEAD. FLAUNT IT. A little peep show never hurt anyone. But yes, please don't go overboard and bare it all. Subtle does it like nothing else does. Speaking from my own experience, when you go buy lingerie, it's something which when you wear makes you feel sexy. Take note of the word used. Yes, I used the term sexy because I read sometime back in the bible (read cosmopolitan), if a woman picks up lingerie that fits well and makes her feel in sync with her inner self, she'll feel good about herself which in turn will make her happy and happy people release endorphins so they don't go around killing people (sorry could not help that last bit. Stole it from legally blonde.)
          Jokes apart, if you have a boyfriend, nothing turns on a guy more than sexy lingerie (that's cosmo talking again.) And if you can't get that bit right sweety, you just died a virgin. A guy wants his girl to look hot from head to toe (of course, there's no denying exceptions though i doubt there will be any in this case, nonetheless) and what a girl wears inside (and i'm not referring to your beautiful/pure heart and mind here) is equally important. So if you don't have a guy cute enough to snoggle, you know where you're going wrong.
           After talking so much about guys, how can I not make a mention of them in my blog? That would, be really mean of me. Honestly *innocent angelic expression* (really wish you could see it right now.) I GET IT DUDES. Low-waist jeans are in vogue and have a long way to go before they become obsolete. But do you really need to wear chaddis that show off the brand name? Of course if the guy is hot (and girls everywhere would agree) and is flaunting Under Colors of Benetton, Allen Solly, Tommy Hilfiger, Provogue or the like, he's pardoned immediately. But wearing VIP Frenchie or Nikky (Indian version of Nike) with the tick designed the opposite way does not pass you off as even cool let alone hot. So if you got the looks use them to your advantage without these hangups. And if you really want to wear those brands which I just mentioned in the latter half, be my guest. Just do us the favor of passing by without flashing even unintentionally. OH and by the way, for your information, flaunting undies for guys is so passe.
          In our society there are a lot of people who don't really care about what they wear inside but honestly, I think the times now to change. And wear all what you want (also don't want) when you're at home. Dress to perfection when you're out. That way women like me who have nothing better to do but criticize will keep their mouths shut for some time.
          While going through a couple of websites, I came across this quotation. The author is unknown but what he/she implied holds a lot of value in this blog. "If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?" Guess that more or less answers your question, eh?